Dear Bently,

You are just a couple days away from being a big 3 year old and I can't even begin to describe how hard this birthday has been for me. For some reason 1 year and 2 years old didn't seem like such a big deal. You still seemed little to me. But 3. 3 is big. Three is preschool and swim lessons and soccer teams. Three is talking in full sentences and having friends. Three is learning to share and showing compassion and thinking of others. Three is doing things with out Mommy. Three is entering the kid world and leaving the toddler one behind. I think what is getting to me the most is three represents three years of not being able to be at home with you all the time. Three years I've missed. Three years worth of memories I don't have. That has hit me hard this week. Even with all the sadness I am so excited to continue to watch you grow and change. And I am so grateful for the memories and fun we have experienced together these last 3 years! :)You are so excited for your Spiderman birthday party and I am excited to watch you just be happy. Nothing gives me more joy than watching you be happy. I love you my almost big boy!

Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

I thought of another funny thing you said. The other night we were trying to convince you to eat your dinner because you don't really eat much of anything. We kept saying "Bently eat some of your chicken!" To which you replied, "No chicken for me. I'm busy!" I laughed really hard!


Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

The other day you went poop on the toilet and cheered of course. Then as you studied your long green poop (sorry for the tmi) you told me it was "Dragon Poop". I laughed pretty hard at you for that one!


Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

You are too cute son. You are in a stage where after you fall down or get hurt you say, "Kiss it!" and point to your Ouchy! It's stinking adorable! I have kissed many strange places because you have asked me too! Including your foot and today (albeit on accident) your tongue. Haha! You moved a little too fast for me on that one! You also beg for hugs and kisses! This morning we were sitting on the couch together when you exclaim "A hug!" and then we hug and you say "A kiss!" I'm not going to lie I loved it! I love every time you want to give me a hug or kiss. As you begin to talk more you remind me more and more often the important parts of life. Like when you sweetly ask "Mama play with me?" You stare up at me with your sweet pleading puppy dog eyes and how can I help but say yes. I love being with you. I love talking to you and listening to what you have to say! Every night as we put you to sleep you say "Mama sleep with me?" I hate having to say no. You are terrified of something in your room (has to do with your window??) and I wish that I could snuggle down and keep you safe. But I know that you are safe and okay.

Today we went to the store before I went to work. You asked "Mama go to the park with me?" I said "Oh sorry buddy, I have to go to work." You reacted like I never imagined. You started crying and through your tears you mumbled "Mama no go to work. Go to the park with me!" My heart broke into a million pieces. "Maybe Dad will take you to the park." I thought that would satisfy you. I assumed you wanted to go to the park and you wouldn't care who took you. "No Dad, Mama go to the park." I can't even tell you how much it hurt me. You have always been a Daddy's boy and never have really cared when I go to work. While I always wanted to be your favorite, I was actually grateful you preferred your Dad. I was so scared of encountering moments like this. I already have so much guilt for working full time and I knew if you started to care that I left, it would make it harder. I was not wrong. Oh how I wish I could just stay home with you always! I would do it in a heartbeat if I could! Your Dad and I are working every day to make that dream into a reality!

I love you my adorable little man! I hope you always know how much I love you. I always make when I tuck you in at night to tell you a million times. I say "Do you know your Mommy loves you!" You always grin and say "yes". I hope that answer never changes and you never doubt how much love I have for you!

Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

Well my son you've gone days without an accident! I'm thinking you are completely potty trained! You've even made it through hour long car rides and have peed in public bathrooms! :) You are amazing my son! I am so proud of you! It's crazy to see you growing up! I love watching you run around in your big boy underpants! You are seriously the cutest! You always tell us, "I have to pee!" Then we set you on toilet and you immediately say "Go away!" I guess you like your privacy! Then once you've done the deed you yell out, "I did it!" It's pretty stinking cute! My mistake was in buying a little toilet, instead of just teaching you to go on the big one every time. I hate having to dump it into the big toilet to flush it! I always get pee on myself! But you love that stupid little toilet. I'm thinking it's going to disappear some day soon... ;)

You've started to say "I love you" a lot more. And more randomly. You will now say it first, without prompting from us. You speech in general has taken off as of late! You now speak in complete sentences. (though they don't always make sense!) You also sing all the time. Daddy had you at the park the other day and you started belting out Miley Cyrus song "Wrecking Ball" at the top of your lungs. I guess you got a few laughs out for the one! ;)

I am so awful! I always think of all these things I want to write about and then as soon as I sit down they're gone! You are at such a fun stage right now and I don't want to forget anything! I'm going to have to be better at writing them down!

I love you my big boy!

Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

Yesterday you went the whole day with no accidents and no peeing in your diaper! I am so incredibly proud of you handsome! :) You did insist on wearing a diaper for part of the day, which is doesn't make sense since you still go on the potty! ;) I guess you really are a big boy now! ;(

Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

This is what I count as day 2 of your self induced potty training. Today was actually a little more bumpy than yesterday. You started out the morning by peeing your pants at the breakfast table. You're already stressed out Dad didn't appreciate that so much. You then insisted on wearing a diaper. We've mostly let you decide. That might change as you get older but forcing you to potty train didn't work before so we're giving this method a go. Even though you were wearing a diaper you still went to the bathroom in the toilet! After you peed and pooped in the toilet you told Dad you wanted underpants. So you're in underpants currently! So I would say it was a pretty successful day! I'm grateful that every single accident you've ever had has always been in the kitchen. It's a miracle really because every where else is carpeted! :)

I love you my big boy! Seeing you wear underwear and go on the potty makes me realize how old you really are! I love you handsome!

Love,
Mom

Dear Bently,

Things sure have changed quickly in our house! Yesterday March 3, 2014 you told Dad that you wanted to go on the potty. He sat you on it but nothing happened. Not even 5 minutes later you told me to put you on the potty. So I did. A little irritated at the way this game is going. When you told me you went potty, I honestly didn't believe you one bit. But to my utter amazement and surprise, you had! You had pooped on the potty! Something you had never done before! I cheered and Dad came in because he had to see it for himself, then he cheered! I was shocked. I told your Dad maybe we wouldn't have change any more poopy diapers. I really didn't believe that anything would come of it. I mean you hated going on the potty. I thought it was some strange fluke. This morning though you wanted underwear. And you wore them pretty much all day long! You went pee on the potty every time. You did go a tiny bit in your undies once but not enough to make a mess even! I am in utter shock right now! You are so grown up. It's just like when you started walking. You went from not wanting to do it, to being pretty much a pro at it! ;) You even tell me when you have to go when I forget to remind you!

To be honest though today has been a hard day. The bribe was you go on the potty and you could play with my phone/nook. I didn't think you would ever go on the potty so when I made that deal, I didn't think I would have to follow through. So all day today you have wanted my phone/nook. That means every 2-10 minutes you are telling me you have to go pee. Even when you just went. Then you push until you get a drop of pee out and then think you get a reward. I don't really know how to fix this problem. All I know is I cannot keep putting you on the potty that often in one day! It's a lot of work. I am so exhausted! ;) You and Livvy kept me on my toes all day long!

I'm proud of you son! You are the cutest little man! You always get so excited when you go on the potty! :) And I am pretty excited too! Maybe we won't have to be diapers for you ever again! I love you so much my heart feels like it's going to burst! :)

Love,
Mom