Dear Bently,

You are too cute son. You are in a stage where after you fall down or get hurt you say, "Kiss it!" and point to your Ouchy! It's stinking adorable! I have kissed many strange places because you have asked me too! Including your foot and today (albeit on accident) your tongue. Haha! You moved a little too fast for me on that one! You also beg for hugs and kisses! This morning we were sitting on the couch together when you exclaim "A hug!" and then we hug and you say "A kiss!" I'm not going to lie I loved it! I love every time you want to give me a hug or kiss. As you begin to talk more you remind me more and more often the important parts of life. Like when you sweetly ask "Mama play with me?" You stare up at me with your sweet pleading puppy dog eyes and how can I help but say yes. I love being with you. I love talking to you and listening to what you have to say! Every night as we put you to sleep you say "Mama sleep with me?" I hate having to say no. You are terrified of something in your room (has to do with your window??) and I wish that I could snuggle down and keep you safe. But I know that you are safe and okay.

Today we went to the store before I went to work. You asked "Mama go to the park with me?" I said "Oh sorry buddy, I have to go to work." You reacted like I never imagined. You started crying and through your tears you mumbled "Mama no go to work. Go to the park with me!" My heart broke into a million pieces. "Maybe Dad will take you to the park." I thought that would satisfy you. I assumed you wanted to go to the park and you wouldn't care who took you. "No Dad, Mama go to the park." I can't even tell you how much it hurt me. You have always been a Daddy's boy and never have really cared when I go to work. While I always wanted to be your favorite, I was actually grateful you preferred your Dad. I was so scared of encountering moments like this. I already have so much guilt for working full time and I knew if you started to care that I left, it would make it harder. I was not wrong. Oh how I wish I could just stay home with you always! I would do it in a heartbeat if I could! Your Dad and I are working every day to make that dream into a reality!

I love you my adorable little man! I hope you always know how much I love you. I always make when I tuck you in at night to tell you a million times. I say "Do you know your Mommy loves you!" You always grin and say "yes". I hope that answer never changes and you never doubt how much love I have for you!

Love,
Mom